Everwood
Review By: Weasel

TV is a great place for people who are boring to watch other people who are also boring do boring things for the people who watch them to keep them from being so bored! This is why the WB is such a wonder-fun station!!! WB is a station with boring shows about boring pretty kids with problems JUST LIKE YOU 'N ME!!

Everwood is one of these shows! It is about a boy and a little girl and their dad! They move to little town of Everwood because the kids' dead mom told them to move to Everwood one day...and then SHE DIED! SUPRISE! The dad is a doctor, who was a famous-tastic surgeon who was famous for being a surgeon! The boy plays piano for his special skills of glory. The boy and dad fight UBER MUCH and the little girl plays with dolls! This sounds like mega excitement right? RIGHT HAMMER BALLS!! I said hammer balls, hahaha! YOU LAUGH! (or not.)

PARAGRAPH 3! The boy meets a girl who's boyfriend is in the hospital in a coma because he...went into a coma...because he did something that was coma-inducing...I guess. He dies and the girl gets sad. You always think, MAN THIS BOY AND GIRL SHOULD HOOK UP!! But they don't because that wouldn't be good TV!!

Good TV makes you wait until the 9th season for such a thing to happen! So the boy ends up having TEH SEX when he is 16 and his girlfriend is his 22 year old babysitter-person!! YAY!!! The girl that the boy never hooks up with when you think they should ends up with a crack-addict boyfriend and doesn't break up with him when she finds out about his crack-addictness because she's all sad and stuff and she can't reject him because he lays a guilt trip on her about how he'll kill himself or something if she dumps him!! AND HE WORKS AT A CONVIENCE STORE AND LIVES IN A TRAILER WITH HIS MOMMY!!!!!

So Everwood is a super crazy show with talking animals and magic puppets. Watch it!! Or better yet, don't! Or do!!! It's all up to you, Smitty!

TREAT WILLIAMS STARS!!!!! He was in the musical HAIR many years ago and sang and was a hippie!! The boy from the show was also in SMALL SOLDIERS!! Good facts of fun for you, yes!!! Now I go sleep!


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