The Making Of Gringo
Written By: Joe

After writing my article on the inner-workings of Listen To Me, I realized that people are just about shooting themselves in the mouth with high-powered rifles wondering about every possible behind-the-scenes aspect of our fine establishment here. Also, I lie a lot and am just doing this because it is fun to write stupid stuff when I should be studying for a math final. Hello F! How are you!? I will meet you tomorrow at 10:30 AM sharp (actually, I'll probably be late)! Anyway, this fine article will take you through the steps involved in the process of making a Gringo comic and/or animation depending on how long it takes me before my chronic ADD sets in and I get tired of writing this. Woofa! Let's go!

Step 1

The process begins when Gringo orders me to write a Gringo comic (is it confusing anyone yet that both the owner of the site as well as a comic are referred to by the same name?). Then I tell him to fuck off and he orders me again and I tell him to fuck off again and we do that for about a week before I finally break down and write a piece of shit comic within about three minutes. This explains the Gringo comic's history of high quality. Here is a helpful drawing to show you how this part of the process takes place:

Step 2

This step can take two different basic forms. In one, I open up my handy dandy computer-based notepad and type out an extremely loose summary of what the next thrilling Gringo should look like and what should take place in it so that I can send it to Gringo (and Ross in the case of our new fantabulous Gringo flash animations). Generally, these summaries look something like this:

In the other version of this step, the new Gringo is invented right in the middle of an IRC chatroom. These are places for losers of the highest caliber to discuss how much their lives suck and to have cybersex. The esteemed members of LTM take part in these activities roughly twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. When Gringo comics are invented in this manner, it usually leads to creative brainstorming on the part of all members of the LTM team as each provides their own input on what should happen in the next Gringo comic. Here is an example of one of our brainstorming sessions:

Step 2-A

This step is an optional one that only occurs if Gringo or Ross is having too much trouble visualizing what I have described for a comic even though I have made it so clear a government official could understand it (well, maybe not). To Gringo and Ross's credit, this rarely happens so this step is generally skipped over altogether. Actually, to be quite honest, this step has only occurred once ever. Usually, we replace this step with group masturbation. It works, I think. Regardless, this is what a storyboard looks like when it is done:

Can't make out any of that, mm? Yeah, life's a bitch, ain't it?!

Step 3

At this point, all the preplanning material is pooled together and shipped off to the animation studio in Korea. No, I just kid! I send it to Gringo and Ross and they get to work in their respective ways! Gringo draws all the characters and, if it's a comic, the comic. If it's an animation, Ross takes all the characters from Gringo and puts them together and makes them walk and move their mouths and that's it because he's lazy. I get to sit. Here is a picture of that:

Step 4

If this particular Gringo is an animation (and the new ones generally are), then we need to record voices. Secret behind-the-scenes information!!!: We realized shortly after we put up the update that we needed voices for Gringo animations that roughly, oh, let's say nobody was going to want to play the part of any of the rejects from Gringo (with or without the free, nifty Gringo mug as part of the deal). Therefore, most of the voices are done by the esteemed members of LTM (mostly me because I am the cool one) or by people we already know through the magic of the internet. That means Gringo doesn't have to send as many mugs out. Anyway, here is what it basically looks like when I record lines:

Step 5

When the comic or animation is done (and please note I am deliberately undermining the extensive process Ross has to go through to finish an animation because I don't know what goes into that process and I don't feel like finding out), it is put up on the internet at some point when Gringo deems it a good time to unleash pain upon the online community. This involves uploading and some other internet stuff which I'm pretty sure looks like this all put together:

Step 6

The comic/animation goes up and is largely unnoticed by everyone all over the world. If someone does, by some strange fluke, happen to see it, I get hate mail. I have yet to get hate mail over a Gringo comic but it's awhile before I get hit by that truck, so says Miss Cleo, so you never know. Anyway, the LTM team goes back to their constant states of depression and I, at the painful realization that I am, in fact, the person who wrote this poor excuse for humor known as Gringo, decide to take another crack at my suicide note. Here it is:

Obviously, it needs some work.

This website is © 2001-2008 Listen To Me. All pictures, sounds and other stuff which doesn't belong to us is © its respective owner(s). Everything else is a free-for-all. Steal anything we created (as if you'd ever want to) and we'll...well, we probably won't be motivated to do anything. But you never know. And yes, that is Colonel Sanders throwing a punch at this copyright notice. SMACK