June 28th, 2002
More Spurt, because Joe knows how much all of you love reading the adventures of the wacky characters he created. Today, he hands over the quality writing task to Jeff for a one-off guest-written comic.

June 26th, 2002
Mack Salmon has reviewed a type of candy known as Sour Ooze Chewz Mega Warheads. I don't know what he's going on about, but maybe if you're American it all makes sense.

June 24th, 2002
I'm too cheap to get MTV, but Joe isn't. He had the misfortune to watch a show called Dismissed, and has written a review of it, complete with lots of swear words. It's not big and it's not clever!

June 21st, 2002
It's time for yet another update we've kind of used before. Today, Ross has taken his picture of a horse and gone into artistic territory that has never been tried before. HE IS THE NEW PICASSO!

June 20th, 2002
What do a green freak, a stupid superhero and a dumb cat have in common? I'd write a witty answer if I could, but instead I'll just say they're all part of my list of the five worst cartoon characters...ever!

June 19th, 2002
It's been a while since there's been a new Spurt comic, but Joe has recently been busy taking the wacky tablets. He's come up with a birthday special edition of the comic which is very close to being special. But not quite.

June 18th, 2002
Another political fake site, this time seeing us embark on a futile quest to get Sheriff Gringo elected as the next U.S. senator for New Jersey in November's election. It will all make sense when you read it. No, honestly, it will.

June 17th, 2002
The lazy follow-up articles continue today in a muted celebration of our one-year-old existence. This time, it's yet more Disney movies being scrutinized for their questionable content.

June 16th, 2002
We thought it'd be funny to rehash old articles for this birthday week thing to show how far we haven't come. First up is another article about junk email with the most original title in the world, ever.

June 15th, 2002
Listen To Me is one year old today. To help celebrate this somewhat meaningless date, there'll be a week of daily updates, starting with the third episode of the Gringo cartoon. Celebrate now! Or don't.

June 12th, 2002
There's a review of the musical comedy movie Bugsy Malone up for your reading pleasure (or displeasure if you want to be a miserable assboat). That's all for today. No, really, that's it. Go away!

June 10th, 2002
Joe has written his first so-called story for the Rants section. It is quite possibly the most irritating, pointless thing I've ever had the displeasure to have to put up on this site. It genuinely gave me a headache. Bastard!

June 7th, 2002
Anyone who had both a 'light gun' and a NES will remember playing alleged gaming classic Duck Hunt. Mack Salmon remembers, and he's written a review to share his tortured past with you.

June 4th, 2002
I wrote a review of Diagnosis Murder. In other news, thank you Entertainment Weekly for spoiling the end of television series 24 for me, with your stupid, stupid news story which ignores the fact the show's still running in Britain.

June 2nd, 2002
Dan wrote a review of System Of A Down's album Toxicity a while ago. Why am I only just putting it up now? It will remain a mystery! Because without mystery PUZZLES WOULD NOT EXIST.

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