The Pixies: Bam Thwok
Review By: Joe

Ohhhh boy, chizzen. For those of you not on track with things that are good, The Pixies, the best band ever regardless of what people who aren't me think, have gotten back together and have been touring. They still sound pretty damn good and I plan to go see them at Lalalalalalalpalooooza even though I don't give a shit about the other bands. The Flaming Lips in particular can suck it just because I know a lot of people like them and I do not.

Well! There were rumors that the band might try to actually record some new shit new shit Fabulous. I didn't think it would happen this quickly but evidently they went ahead and pooted out a new song that was released for purchase (99 cents!!) on the ITunes website on Tuesday, June 15th. I didn't find out about it till today (Friday) so I just got it nice and illegally free off of Kazaa Lite. I've so far found a lot of positive comments about it online and as this is my favorite band I feel it necessary to say that it's, um, not very good. IT IS IMPORTANT I DO THIS!

The song is called Bam Thwok. It is kind of upbeat and full of retardation. It has lyrics in it about saying Wakka Wakka and being homoerotic on balconies, or at least that is what I took from it. Here is why it isn't good.

For one thing, it seems to me they are trying to use Joey Santiago's guitaring the way it used to be but not really giving him anything interesting to play. It's more like a rehash of old stuff rather than just Joey being cool.

It's not a HORRIBLE song but the lyrics are pretty lame and it doesn't invoke the same feelings in me as classic Pixies does, plus it sounds almost a bit too clean for them. It wouldn't be quite as poor without this organ solo thing (apparently some rather old recording played by Joey Santiago's father-in-law) they crammed into the middle of it. It is way too long and completely derails the entire thing.

It's uncertain as to whether the Pixies will make more new songs or not but I have to say I'm a bit worried about how they might come out now. All hope is not completely lost though. For one thing, like I said, this song isn't that bad. I feel pretty much the same about it as I feel toward a decent Frank Black solo song. It's okay but it's not anywhere near old-school Pixies. I probably would even like it more if it were just Frank Black but considering that this is supposed to be Pixies material, it's a little more disappointing. Also, the organ thing should just plain not be in it.

Granted, this song was written and the main vocals are by Kim Deal, whose songwriting abilities I can't say I've ever taken much stock in. Gigantic is fine but Silver is the only song I don't really like on Doolittle. At the very least, the poor lyrics can be explained away by Kim's involvement. Maybe Frank can still actually pull some coolness off. I would love to hear him screaming and shrieking through some new songs, something which he isn't given an opportunity to do here.

Apparently Kim Deal wrote it based on some book she found in the street with a story written by a little kid in it about a party in another universe where monsters and people come together to dance and get along. Apparently she said this: "It's a song about loving everyone...showing goodwill to everyone."

I do not think I am alone when I say be quiet you silly drunk.

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